I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
