if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
nutella sex= disaster
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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