Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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