Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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