too bad you live with your parents still
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
