That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
