You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Sorry my hands just texted you
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
