i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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