If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
