I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
