I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
