I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
