Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
