Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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