My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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