Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
