$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Come on in and take your pants off
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