one word: firstdatebathroomanal
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
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