if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
