Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
