My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
