Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
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