P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
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Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
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The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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