I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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