It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
