I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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