I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
