hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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