State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
