8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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