idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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