Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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