Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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