Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You have to summon your inner elephant
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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