I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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