one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
