I am puke
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
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I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize