Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
All the doctor said was why
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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