It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
