We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
there was a trapeze. enough said
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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