I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You are a genius and a whore.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize