The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
