Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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