i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize