Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
