people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
