splinters make it hard to masturbate
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
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