Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
this will be a night to untag.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I need a beard to bite.
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