"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
she told me i tasted like america
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize