does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
